Certain people seem to be pumping me for information on how much I've revised for my promotional exams. Its kinda scary.. And one of them seems really stressed. Not that I care. Im more scared that I won't get promoted. Because I don't wanna waste an additional year studying when I could be off to university in another year and a quarter. Well, I've become motivated to study. Heh heh. I'll do it as soon as I take a shower, or maybe a nap too. Well, at least tmr's Friday! And we won't be doing one of those accursed Chinese compos! Say what you will,but I dont like chinese lessons. I think they are just an additional burden (because my peers who don't take Chinese classes have more time and go home earlier) and I hate writing Chinese essays. They piss me off. But no, I don't mind reading the Chinese language. Im really ok with reading Chinese stuff, and I never have any problems understanding. But well, I digress.
I really wonder if there are people out there who really are talking about me. Cos there was this time in PE (what am I saying! It happened only today!) whereby I was walking towards a guy from another class who was seated. He actually stared for a bit(nothing remarkable) but then when i sat in front of him (duh,with my class) I heard some girl say 'if she put any more then might become albino' and some guy replied 'wow so bad!' and she was like 'oh sorry I didn't know you admired her' or something like that. I mean, I could be hypersensitive (hell, I probably was!) but with a look like what he had given me beforehand, how could I not be suspicious? Things like that have happened before, where it feels as if something concerns me, yet it just shouldn't be the case since they are not people I have even spoken to before. Its just weird. Doubtless I'm being paranoid,but better to know than not. I hope not,though. I don't like people touching me, I don't like strangers talking to me, hell, I don't even like people looking at me as I walk past them in the hallways! Even for a brief second. I don't like it. Subconsciously, I turn my head to the side a little and avert my eyes. Maybe it's poor self-confidence, but I don't want to see.. I don't know, their disgust or something. There! Now I know for sure there's something wrong with me. Disgust?!! What the hell?!!!! It seems like such a strong reaction..
Thursday, September 15, 2011
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